You have to admit: gutters are a pretty smart way to channel roof runoff water away from a building’s foundation; which makes it all the more mystifying why some people do stupid things with their gutters.
Here are nine of the most dimwitted gutter-related stories you’ll find anywhere
1. Thaw gutter ice with a blowtorch.
Lots of homeowners face the problem of ice dams in their gutters. But (almost) none of them try to melt this ice with a blowtorch. Sadly, one homeowner in Murray, Utah somehow thought this would be a good idea. One partially-burned attic and $20,000+ in damage later, he might be rethinking that decision.
2. Use a gutter to keep from falling.
Admittedly, this man probably didn’t plan on doing this when he climbed up his ladder to hang Christmas lights. But the good news is he now knows that his gutters are sturdy enough to handle almost anything. The bad news? The relative/neighbor/friend who chose to take a picture of the event before offering aid.
3. Write a short story about gutters.
Sure, everyone has their own writing style. But one would think that penning a story entitled “The Oak Tree & the Gutter: A Funny Short Story” would actually involve the end product beingâ€¦ umâ€¦ funny. Alas, it’s about a guy who washes his car, then gets up on the roof and cleans his gutters. A real knee-slapper.
4. Rap about gutters.
Evidently, no one had the courage to tell the owner of Gary’s Gutters of Rockland, New York, that a TV commercial featuring a pudgy, curly-haired white guy rapping about gutter cleaning and roofing services was a bad idea. (“Sure, boss. That’ll be great!”) But maybe the company will get some business because customers feel sorry for the actor. Yes, it’s that painful to watch.
5. Fix a broken downspout with a soda bottle.
Instead of spending money on actual metal, why not repair a downspout with something that’s just lying around the house? Or in the garbage can? Although, this does provide a new take on “recycling plastic bottles.”
6. Fix a misaligned downspout with a soda bottle.
“And while you’re at it honey, will you fix that misaligned downspout? That won’t be too much trouble, will it?”
“No dear, of course not.”
7. Prop up a loose gutter with a broom.
While it’s certainly important to fix sagging gutters so they don’t cause runoff water to pool and spill onto the ground, using tables and a pushbroom to prop it in place isn’t what’s known as a “long-term solution.”
8. Creatively reroute gutters.
It’s hard to figure out what the owner of this building was thinking. Was he trying to cobble together a working gutter with existing scraps of piping and aluminum? Or was his goal to build a Rube Goldberg water-channeling contraption?